FIC: The Best &%@*!^ Date in the Universe

Title: The Best &%@*!^ Date in the Universe
Author: musikologie/oddest_nooks
Rating: PG for KAT-TUN's collective dirty mind
Notes/Disclaimer: Still not a Kitagawa. Written for the February 2009 installment of the One Hour Fic/Porn Challenge. The theme this time was "JE love songs", so this was written while listening to "Yorokobi no Uta" for an hour on repeat. ...I think it shows.

Here are the other fics: anamuan | crystallekil | iverin | jackoweskla | ky_rin | mousapelli | nicocoer | pastdazed | pearljemz | snoozing_kitten

<a href="http://anamuan.livejournal.com/327785.html">anamuan</a> | <a href="http://community.livejournal.com/shoulderouscomb/47134.html">crystallekil</a> | <a href="http://community.livejournal.com/zekkouchou/14301.html">iverin</a> | <a href="http://oddest-nooks.livejournal.com/14321.html">jackoweskla</a> | <a href="http://community.livejournal.com/chromatico/2923.html">ky_rin</a> | <a href="http://mousapelli.livejournal.com/558219.html">mousapelli</a> | <a href="http://nicocoer.livejournal.com/336106.html">nicocoer</a> | <a href="http://pastdazed.livejournal.com/36905.html">pastdazed</a> | <a href="http://pearljemz.livejournal.com/40531.html">pearljemz</a> | <a href="http://users.livejournal.com/_wristcutshow_/28815.html">snoozing_kitten</a>


Summary: Koki's got to get a present for that special lady in his life, so KAT-TUN lends a helping hand. Well... maybe 'help' is too strong a word.

"I need to buy a birthday pressent for my girl," Koki says, stroking his goatee. "Got any suggestions?"

Nakamaru stops. "We're in the middle of a grocery store. This is not the right store for this."

"Yeah," Koki says, peering over the counter. "I'm thinking this tuna looks good."

"Aren't you a bit more of a romantic? Flowers, trip to Paris, new car..."

"My girl likes to eat," Koki shrugs. "Or shrimp! She loves shrimp, too."

"Can't you go the more traditional route, a box of chocolates?" Nakamaru wrinkles his nose as Koki pushes a particularly smelly piece of fish in front of his face for him to inspect. "Get that away from my nose! Or chocolate covered strawberries?"

"Allergic to chocolate," Koki mutters. "Yeah, this tuna looks good. Plus, I'll have dinner for tonight!"

"You certainly have a way with women," Nakamaru remarks.

"You're not allowed to talk, Mr. I-Go-To-Group-Dates-And-Love-Hotels," Koki replies.

"Hey!" Nakamaru cries. "That was only once."

"Yeah."

"The love hotel thing."

"Right."

"Not... not the group date thing."

"I rest my case," Koki says, heading toward the checkout.

+

"Jewelry? Let me see." Jin grabs the sketch from Koki and inspects it closely.

"I want it with gold chain," Koki describes, "and small jewels around it, so they twinkle nicely against her. Maybe some rubies, sapphires..."

Jin considers the request. "I think Jun'll be able to manage that, sure. He does quite a bit of custom work, and'll do anything for me. It's kind of short notice, though."

"I've been having trouble thinking of what to get her," Koki explains. "But this really..." Koki strains for the right word. "...encapsulates our relationship."

Jin squints at the paper, turning it slightly. "What relationship do you and your girlfriend have exactly? Seems kind of... kinky." He grins.

"I suppose it's unorthodox," Koki says defensively.

Jin licks his lips. "Cool."

+

"Girls love hair accessories," Junno says emphatically, walking his way decisively through the storefront. He stops at a display of various trinkets and jewels. "A nice clip, or barette, or comb..."

Koki looks at all of the choices, mind boggling. The wall was bedazzled more than his last costume. "That pink one, maybe, like a cherry blossom...." His hand extends to reach for a small barette, delicate cherry blossoms dangling from silver strands.

"That's so cute!" Junno's hands fly up in the perfect imitation of a shoujo manga character. "Perfect for a girl on a special day."

Koki turns it around, his face draining at the sight of the price tag. "She better appreciate it."

+

"A present?" Ueda unravels the tape off of his hand with practised ease. "You should get new sheets for your bed."

If Koki hadn't been sparring with Ueda for two hours, he would have turned bright red. Thankfully, he was red already. "Excuse me?"

"Well, I saw your bed the last time I picked you up, and if you're bringing a girl there...." He lets the sentence trail off meaningfully.

"The giant holes in the sheets are a turn-off, aren't they?" Koki finally says.

"I was thinking the Dragonball print, but sure, if that makes you feel better."

+

"Maybe a bottle of wine," Kame says, digging through his bag.

Koki rolls his eyes at his cellphone. "No, she doesn't drink."

"Chocolate?"

"Doesn't eat chocolate."

"Flowers?"

"She's not a bouquet kind of girl."

Kame glares. "Why are you even asking me? Just go and date that porn star again, she was easy."

"Hey, I value your opinion!" Koki shouts into the phone, scaring the old woman next to him on the train. He nods his head apologetically. "Any other ideas?"

Kame sighs. "Just... my old girlfriend liked it if I sang to her."

"Really?" Koki pauses for a moment. "That might work. "Thanks, Kame-chan."

"Don't call me --" Kame throws the phone back into his bag, hoping that Koki's date fails miserably.

+

After Koki fits the new (black, silk) sheets on his bed, he places a plate of the finest tuna onto them. "Come here, sweetie," he calls.

Sakura bounds in, new collar gleaming in the sunlight, hairclip flying out behind her ear. Koki smiles into her fur. "You're the best girl in the world, aren't you, Sakura?" Sakura barks. "Happy birthday, sweetie." Sakura gives Koki a lick across the face before settling into the plate of food, tail wagging furiously.

Koki smiles gently, fingers running through her fur. Closing his eyes he sings quietly, "I love you, I love you~~"